Emotional Fantasy vs. Sexual Fantasy

Well now. Been a while since my last post. And even longer since my last non-game-related post. So I'll attempt to remedy that now. I was mulling over a different topic earlier, but I think I'll save that one for another day. Probably better to go with the one that's fresher in my mind at the moment. So let's get to it.

Much is often made of the inherent differences between men and women. We look different, act different, dress different, come from different planets. Etc, etc. And it's true. There are always exceptions, of course, but I'm into making blanket statements today. Men think about sex. A lot. Women think about romance. A lot. Not exactly news, is it? Well, my take on it might be, and here it is: these wildly different preoccupations of the sexes and the fantasies they inevitably inspire are entirely comparable and should be treated as such.

In both cases, the fantasizer is not using his/her head. I mean, obviously. That's why they're called fantasies. They're not realistic. They may be emotionally or sexually gratifying, but they damn sure aren't logical. If a guy saves a girl from being mugged, chances are she's not going to race back to his place, tear her clothes off, and bang out his reward. By the same token, chances are he's not going to usher her home via handsome cab while sipping wine and reciting poetry.

Yeah, nice flower.
But where's your white horse and royal insignia?

By and large, we are downright stupid when it comes to our fantasies. Fortunately, they're relatively harmless...until we try to act them out, even on a small scale. That's when the troubles arise.

Women don't want to accept sexual advances nearly as often as men want to make said advances. That's well understood. And no one looks down on women for rejecting these advances (nor should they). But it seems to me like it's widely accepted--and even expected--to look down on men for making the advances in the first place. And the male preoccupation with sex, in particular, is heavily frowned upon.

The female preoccupation with romance, on the other hand, seems to be heavily encouraged and promoted. Even though the male response to this mirrors the female response to sex: use sparingly, only when I want it. Society sides with the ladies here. Dating/chivalry/marriage = good. Sex = bad.

Why the discrepancy? When people frequently fall into these flights of fantasy, they are simply being true to their nature. Why is this okay for women but not for men? Why is the objectification of women unconscionable and the pussification of men laudable? Double standard FTL.

I think I'm in the wrong place...

Now, I realize my female readers (all two or three of you) might cry foul on this one. You might think it's the other way around, where society actually caters more to male fantasies (in entertainment, for instance). Maybe so (though there certainly never seems to be a shortage of chick flicks). Or maybe it caters more to one sex in one arena and more to the other sex in another arena.

Either way, for both men and women, the key to handling these differing predilections is compromise. Whenever you feel like vilifying the other side, stop and think about your own moronic fantasies and just how often you try to push them on people who want nothing to do with them. Be understanding and tolerant. You can't always have your way. No matter who you are.